May I Hebb Your Attention Pliss

Arnab Ray


This is one of those books, that you happened to pick up because of the wacky cover, giggle, open, flip through and then not put down till you're incapacitated with laughter.
Quite the same scenario here.
This book is by a fellow blogger The Great Bong  and is really worth your time.


A breath of what might be hallucinogen induced air, this non fiction has all the components of our Bollywood pot boiler seeing how it is greatly influenced by one.
Expert deconstruction of the great Mithun Da starrer Gunda and other gems like Loha and Gupt make this book priceless.


Other Indian ready-to-eat mixes also tossed up are Management Institutes, SMS-ese, Soap operas, Reality Shows, News Channels, NRI's, The Great Indian Weddings, Call Centers and their praiseworthy flagellation.


The language is engaging; the writing is snide, witty and humorous and the content while having no apparent connection flows into each other. 


At no point is the book jarring, and the chapter about the Sexual Frustration is supremely imaginative.


One very singular point about this book is that it has been written entirely with the Indian Audience in mind, other nationalities won't really get the awesomity of the book simply because they wont understand it.
My personal opinion is that Arnab Ray probably didn't pause to think at all about the implications of narrowing his book down to a desi audience at all and I'm supremely glad he didn't. 
This might one day considered to be a work of art and we don't want it to be compromised due to the publishing and editing team's statistical crapola. And come on, he has 1/6 of the world population as his target audience and that is quite blinding!


You have to read it! 
(If you are an Indian, that is)


Rating 4.5/5


Vanilla Frappe!

3 Cups Of Tea

Greg Mortenson

How much difference can a person make? If ‘Three Cups of Tea’- an account of Greg Mortenson’s life is anything to go by, plenty.

When American mountaineer Greg Mortenson blunders into the Pakistani village of Korphe after a failed attempt at conquering K2, his life changes. As he begins to see the impoverished village in Pakistan through a non-mountaineer’s eyes, he promises to set up a school for the children of the village, and thus begins his journey across Pakistan.
From learning to handle Balti culture to corrupt Pakistani middlemen, from writing 580 letters to American celebrities for donations to traversing war-hit South Asia in a Land Cruiser, the journey is a painstaking and a path-breaking one, and you can almost picture schools sprouting, like dots on a map, across Pakistan as the story of Greg Mortenson’s work is recounted. As the story weaves through, and is shaped by, extraneous events like the emergence and eventual overthrow of the Taliban, the 9/11 bombings, and the launch of the war on terror, the book offers an interesting, if not in-depth, look at the geo-politics of the region as seen by the people inhabiting it. As an Indian, a few viewpoints jar- India always referred to as the ‘Hindu country to the East’, references to the Indian army being the first to shell Pakistan, and to shell indiscriminately- but it must be kept in mind that these opinions are meant to be biased- they are simply an account of sentiments from the other side.
Where the book fails is with the personal- as a reader, I didn’t warm to Greg Mortenson. I respect what he has accomplished immensely, but that didn’t translate into the emotional attachment one associates with biographies. Perhaps this is a deliberate effort to focus, as Greg Mortenson does, on the mission and to spread it, and to stay away from hyperbole. Commendable though the intention might be, the narration leaves you wanting. At one point in the book, Greg Mortenson wonders how much distance matters- would a high-ranking official sitting in the Pentagon be as affected by orphans in Pakistan and demolished schools in Afghanistan as someone who has witnessed such events? The book has not managed to bridge the distance- the horrors that the author talks about do not seep into the heart.
Three Cups of Tea is a gripping story that could have done with a better narrator. it isn’t great literature, but despite its flaws, read it for an inspiring tale of what human resolve can do, and how anyone armed with it can make a difference.

Rating 3.5/5

Soy Latte!

A spot of bother

Mark Haddon.

Sometimes, you pine for books. You could spend years wanting them and never being in the financial league to acquire them. This is where we send up a loud cheer for second hand books :)

I found this one at a poky old sale. I'd been wanting it ever since the Curious Incident of the dog in the nighttime, and reading it has been immensely satisfying. First off, its not really in that league.But its nicely written, spectacularly funny sometimes and gives you a nice peek into someone else's head, which is what i believe every good book should do.

The book begins with George, an old married guy who finds a lesion on his hip. This sort of makes him wack-o and unhinges him progressively through the book. Its compounded with his daughter's impending wedding to a guy he doesn't exactly deem suitable, his gay son's boyfriend and his wife's affair with David. In the end, the book is about how all of these come to a head and how all the characters deal with their frustrations and anxieties.

A spot of bother is a good Sunday sort of read, where you don't expect Die Hard sort of action. and come away feeling satisfied. Its one of those relaxed reads, where you feel nice about the ending, cheer for the people and don't get pissed off at the guy for writing the book. Which is so much more than I can say for some of the crap I've been subjected to in the name of fiction.

Rating: 4/5

Vanilla Frappe :)

The Enchantress of Florence

Salman Rushdie

This book is like a tempestuous love affair.

It's challenging for somebody who isn't used to Rushdie's mystic style but once you tap it, it's like entering a fantasy land filled with delightful surprises at every step.
A majestic read, set in the historic era of the Mughals of Akbar and Florence of Lorenzo de' Medici , Rushdie weaves an intricate tale around these times and their offspring.

The story begins with the arrival of an exotic and mysterious visitor to Sikri - Mogor dell'Amore (Mughal of Love) - who claims to be in the possession of a secret of biblical proportions. He reaches the royal court with the help of Skeleton, a prolific prostitute. Afer much historical by-play it is revealed that the mysterious Florentine is Akbar's great uncle.


Enormous uproar ensues and it is here that Akbar's character gains an even more layered complexity. Sometimes whimsical, sometimes petulant and most of the time passionate; Akbar is a man lost between imagination and questions. The flickering Jodha and Qara Koz (the enchantress of Florence) grip him alternately and lead him down the by lanes of Renaissance history. A world of Ottomans and Machiavelli, of Amerigo Vespucci and Vlad Dracula and of Genghis Khan and Medicis. 


In reality, the title of this book is a smoke screen. The book has little to do with Qara Koz. It has more to do with the comparisons drawn by Akbar and Machiavelli between their respective domains. Of their anguish which has no outlet, and their doubts which can only be answered by themselves. Rushdie has tried to evolve a theme through them. He has dared to make them question religion and boundaries, almost willing us to question ourselves and leave us wondering. 


As Rushdie picks his way through the chess-board of medievalist times he touches upon many threads. He flits on to art and dreams, seduction and longing, families and fate, destiny and defeat, kings and armies, friends and power, riches and rational thought. Its as if he envelopes a short medieval history of nearly everything.   


This novel is like a perpetual dream which doesn't end properly. Fragments are left niggling in the corner of your mind long after you've put the book down. Connections which you keep trying to make, ideas you suddenly grasp. It's like a whiff of something divine, this masterpiece. 


Rating: 
5/5. Yes, at the risk of sounding like an infatuated teenager, you must read it.


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My Friend Sancho

Amit Varma

A love story between a Bengali journalist and a Muslim student set in Mumbai, Amit Varma’s first effort ‘My Friend Sancho’ is a breezy read.

Crime reporter Abir Ganguly gets the break of his life when he is asked to do a feature on a Muslim man mistakenly killed by the Mumbai police under Inspector Thombre. What his boss doesn’t know is that Abir was present at the killing- at the behest of Thombre himself.

As Abir interacts with the murdered man’s daughter Muneeza, the professional relationship grows into a friendship as Abir struggles to write an honest feature on the incident having heard the stories from either side of the line- the murderer’s and the victim’s.

The book paints an accurate picture of upper middle-class attitudes in the big cities of India; for instance, the difference in economic class between Muneeza and Abir takes precedence over her religion in Abir’s head. Abir’s grappling with the moral issues of the incident aren’t simplistic (a la a certain Mr. Bhagat, let’s say) and offer the reader a look at both sides of the picture. Abir Ganguly’s sarcastic take on life and most things in it (very reminiscent of the author himself, as most readers of his blog will notice) induce wry, knowing grins, and Abir’s back-and-forths with his subconscious self are quirkily done.

Amit Varma’s prose is brief and to the point; as an ex-journalist and blogger, he respects the economy of space, resulting in a tone fitting for the POV of Abir Ganguly. A book that you’ll finish in one sitting, ‘My Friend Sancho’ makes for an entertaining, read-once novel. 

Rating

I'd give it a 3/5 for it's honesty, and for staying away from cliches and caricatures, often a safe route to the bank.

~ Shweta Ramdas

Note: We would like to thank Shwetu for taking the time out and mailing us this review.

In her words, she hates her review; but we all know better. 

If you would like to send in a book review, please drop a comment, we'll get in touch.

Chacha Chaudhry and Aflatoon

- Pran

Yes, He of the computer-esque brain :)

These hols have been long and generously peppered with maternal shrieks of "Clean the damn bookshelf". Now, cleaning the bookshelf takes superhuman efforts and Old testament levels of tolerance for minor dust storms.

Buried under tottering piles of books I'll never read again( old Gokulams, VC ASndrews, Maeve Binchy and her ilk), I found various mangy copies of Chacha Chaudhry, Billu and Pinky. The charm of these regulars in the class 4 days of youth still shines on. All the reasons for reading it in those days of yore, stand firm today. May pulpy tackiness and hideous grammar shine forever.

I read This one from cover-to-cover. the first page has that unflattering mug shot of Pran, a man I greatly respect for churning out infinite number of comics. The first story in this one has the truck Dag-Dag. I wont go into details of the other "plots", but needless to say, volcanoes did explode on Jupiter and there were many cries like "Hu-Huba"

The appeal of Chacha Chaudhary lies in his middle-class, common man image and the complete absence of any visible physical powers. Sabu (soap man!!!) shines in all the stories, his overwhelmingly huge, black Speedo-clad frame hogging the limelight. The usual elements remain,particularly dialogues like , " I go now", " Oh-ho. The hut fly" " Chacha-ji, you are an angle"

An angle he is, to the many people who rush to him for aid after being bullied/extorted/robbed/cheated/cursed/tortured. He helps them all out and gives us searing glimpses into his computer like brain.

We like. Tackiness is a fine art form, and I'm currently pleased to wallow in it :)

Rating:

Vanilla Frappe. Just because :) This is a giggle fiesta from the first panel.

Foucault's Pendulum

By Umberto Eco

Two years ago, when I was considerably younger and dumber, I picked up Foucault's Pendulum, read the first 50 pages and then quietly admitted defeat. This is one book that lists approximately 10 things you've never heard of one every single page. Yes. Every page.

Dumb aggie felt largely stupid and gave it up, till the book was flung again in my general direction.

This time around, much thanks to Blackle and Wikipedia, for sorting many things out. For instance, exactly what Foucault's Pendulum, Kabbalah, Pico della Mirandola, the Torah, the Templars, Rosicrucians, alchemy and blah were.

So scary things aside, the book is simply spectacular. It begins with Casaubon, hiding in the Musee des Arts et Meties in Paris waiting for Something Bad to happen. The rest of the story unfolds in a non linear manner ( journal entries, Casaubon's increasingly giddy narratives and Belbo's computer) leading up to why he's secreted away in the museum.

I don't want to give away the major plot elements here, but largely, the book is about The Plan that Casaubon and his colleagues Belbo and Diotavelli make up while editing increasingly crazy manuscripts about all those things I mentioned above.Creepily enough for them, their plan starts coming alive and results in horrific consequences in their lives.

Through the course of the book, everything from pinball, to rural Italy, cults, immortal Counts, wars, Fascists and Caribbean spiritualism fuck around with their (and your) heads. The book is a crazy, amazing read that forces you to look at the world and laugh at all the stupid bastards that populate it. It mocks all the sort of pseudo-intellectual psycho-babble that people make fortunes writing about, while masterfully avoiding the same pitfalls. The braod genre could be a book of conspiracy theories, but Foucault's Pendulum is a lot more than just that.

Must read for anyone who nurtures secret ambitions to assainate Dan Brown with pointy rose shaped shuriken. Ooh, and Eco, apart from being a philosopher, is a professor of Semiotics. Semiotics, people. We dont even know what that means. We are dumb and we need to read more books like this

Rating: 6/5. Its that awesome.

Shut up and read it. Please. I want to have long protracted discussions with someone on the complexities of such amazing writing.

Twenties Girl

Sophie Kinsella


Remember Holly Golightly in Breakfast at Tiffany's? How she would do the most absurd things, live for pleasure, be delightfully self-centered and benign all at once and make you love her for all of it? 
Sadie, the co-protagonist of this wonderfully light book channels Holly's essence in the most endearing manner possible. 

Lara Lington, the 'heroine' of this novel is very like the other chicklit gals we have come to recognize. She is attractive, unlucky in love (till the 'hero' comes along), perpetually in foot-in-mouth situation and utterly confused.

Oh yeah, she can also talk to her great-aunt Sadie's ghost. Who, by the way, is not 105 - Sadie the ghost, is a 23, snooty fashionista belle with a wicked sense of humor. 


The story begins with the death of her 105 year old great-aunt Sadie. Lara, wallowing in self-cooked misery about her break up with boyfriend Josh is not exactly willing to go. Turns out, neither is the rest of the family.
At the funeral, only her family and her billionaire uncle, Bill Lington's family turns up (a sum total of 8 people including the vicar). The only glitch is Sadie is not quite ready to say goodbye. Not without her necklace, which somebody has stolen from her.


Thereby follows a pleasantly twisting plot; with Lara managing to halt the funeral under the cover of a murder story, Sadie, a handsome American hunk, Sadie, Sadie-Lara-american hunk's bizzare love triangle, hilarious patch up attempts with Josh, Sadie, a mystery involving the missing necklace and a painting, Sadie, occult powers and Sadie.


While Lara is the actual protagonist, it's Sadie who charms her way into your heart, with her unapologetic wit, unabashed sense of fun and a believable measure of tenderness. Also, quite risqué, this one! Leaves you in throes of giggles over flapper dresses, barney-mugging and her un-twenties ideas.


Charmingly written characters, a delicately balanced and touching insight into Sadies and Lara's friendship, and sprinkled with the twenties element (as Sadie belongs to the 1920's) Twenties Girl makes for an amazingly fun and enchanting read. 


Rating: 4/5  While most of the characters are predictable, the plot line is fresh and extremely entertaining. A book you will smile your way through and not put down till you are done with it. Those who will ban it outright for being chicklit, don't. It's that good a book. So, unless you are loaded with stubborn testosterone or are resolutely averse of the happy-bubbly feeling, you should definitely pick this one up.

The Platypus of Doom and other Nihilists

This one's by Arthur Byron Cover

So we've all read Douglas Adam's and worshipped at the altar of His awesomeness. Science fiction generally stops right there for us. Then someone like dear Arthur comes along and takes our limited perspective, drags it across the length and breadth of the existent universe, pounds it with the aid of giant, hairy monsters and makes us clutch our suddenly expansive heads, moaning softly.

Huh? Wait. From the start then.

The Platypus of Doom is exactly what it sounds like. A monster platypus that despite its noble intentions spreads doom in the universe. This is accomplished by granting people exactly what they truly desire.

Think about it. What if you were granted your heart's true desire? How would it change your life? For the better? Or is the tiny-whiny-achy-breaky motion picture of desires in your head, a nightmare in real life?

Heavy duty shit. And Byron keeps you laughing through it. Laughing, thinking and getting progressively weirded out.

The first story is about the Platypus God who meets a young ping-pong champion on an alien planet. Throw in a dead girlfriend, a lengthy match, a crazy Boss Man and the afterlife for a zany sort of read.

We then meet the Armadillo of Destruction next. This pink headed cigar smoking being has a clear agenda. Spreading Hate. He does this by encouraging mortals who've been repeatedly fucked over by life to hate with a passion and use their newly acquired superpowers to wreck general destruction and chaos.

The Aardvark of Despair follows next, with his penchant for despair and gloom in a chilling story that makes you wish for happy pills in colourful bottles.

The Clam of Catastrophe is last in this twisted line-up. She seduces and lures you into her "soft visceral mass", spreading disillusionment. Oh, and she has a Sherlock Holmes-esque "Godman" to love. Fireworks. Fuck this love thing.

Byron's world is littered with strange new planets, super human beings and yes, even a world where Fat is Beautiful. His unreal, sadistic and creepy monsters bring to life a new sort of fear. An intellectual black hole of general pessimism and despair.

I will obviously indulge in pointless comparisons with Hitchhikers. The same setting, the same madness, the same wow-that-is-so-banal-and-yet-I'm-making-it-excruciatingly-funny tone of writing, but without the comic effects that Adam's is so good at.

I'm clueless about why Platypus is not in the limelight, when it clearly deserves a few harsh glaring disco lights sort of glory. This book is great if you like weird reads/books that make you think/are slightly sick of life and wish to become a nihilist. In that case,this will push you firmly over the edge.

"The Devil you know is better than the devil you dont"

- last read in the Tommyknockers by Stephan king

Rating: 5/5 if you really dig science fiction/weird creatures(this description of the Aardvark should seal it for you: A meter and half long, covered with thick red skin and sandy coloured, bristly hair. Black thick tail, black, glassy eyes. generates his own crawling red ants as food)

4/5 otherwise